Daydream Tarnation [Rough, Rough Draft]

[catharsis_logs]

Loki had been wandering. Cursed by his 'father' to wander the roads of Midgard, until he had 'learnt his lesson'. He could still use his magic, still had his strength, but Odin had bound it so that he would not be able to turn his magic against another.

He wakes up on the side of the road, which briefly surprises him, he has no need of sleep so he just walks the highways day through night through day, over and over again. Traveling the country of 'United States'. He wakes up, and has no memory of where he is, and he just lies in a pool of something that he quickly identifies as his own blood. His body has healed his wounds in the time he lay unconscious but he knows that something must be wrong with his brain and/or his magic, because standing beside him, a concerned look on his face, is Thor.

Loki pulls himself into a sitting position, grimacing at the state of his bloodsoaked clothes. He must have been hit by a truck to produce this much blood. Doubtless the trucker man had fled fearing of his own incarceration for hitting someone. Either that or he hadn't cared, just another homeless fool on the highway at night. He magics the blood off his sweatshirt and jeans and gets to his feet deftly (for a man that has been hit by a truck) avoiding Thor's grip.

Loki muttered an expletive that he'd learned from one of the 'rest stops' he passed through on his way to the next city and on to the next highway. "Loki!" Thor admonishes.

"The hallucination speaks." Loki mumbles and begins to walk down the highway, his still-blood soaked shoes sticking to the pavement.

"Loki!" Thor protests, "It is I, your brother! I am as real as you are!"

Loki just laughs weakly and then stumbles when a car whooshes past him, he quickly regains his feet, glaring away the fake Thor. "No brother of mine would be caught dead standing at the side of the road with me exiled. No brother of mine would care."

Loki keeps walking and the hallucinated Thor hurries to catch up with him. Loki stares out over the road, morning light beginning to stream across the horizon. A car with a little girl in the back slowly passes, Loki waves to the little one and she startles and hides underneath the door frame. He smiles at the suspicous parents and then they speed up and are gone.

"My brother would never wave at a little mortal child." Thor speaks quietly and Loki just shakes his head and keeps walking.

"I always had a weakness for children," Loki mutters, it's not like this Thor is real and would care about his weaknesses. It felt almost good to confess a weakness, as not-real as this Thor is. It's almost like telling a secret to a clone, it just accepts.

"What was that Loki? I could not quite hear you, these mortal chariots are loud, and fast. Almost as fast as I can fly with Mjolnir!" Loki rolls his eyes, even a fake Thor is boastful and arrogant.

"Brother?" Thor pauses at the side of the road, Loki stops and faces the construct. "Why do you not speak to me?"

"What use is there in talking to a hallucination?" Loki rebukes and a little flash of concern passes through not-Thor's eyes. Loki shakes his head and massages his temples with his long fingers. "Something must have happened to damage my brain." Loki mumbles, feeling at his blood-stiff hair.

"But Loki, I have come to rescue you! Father saw you hit by that chariot and declared your exile to Midgard over. I agree with him, seeing how you reacted to that mortal child's curiosity."

Loki sighed, closed his eyes, and started to walk again, he knew the feel of the pavement under his feet. It had been ten years, walking these roads. He knew the feel of this place now, it was part of him. This wasn't the first time he'd been hit, but it was the first time he'd been injured so badly. The construct was offering him everything he'd ever wanted since two years had passed on the roads.

"I've been hit before." Loki said, "And I'll be hit again." He laughs high and shrill. "No amount of pain I suffer will I be able to come home. I expect I have a few decades left of walking to do."

"Loki! Listen to me, I am real! And what I speak is the truth!"

Loki whirls around so fast his head spins spitting words into this false Thor's face. "Then why do you not touch me. Why is it that you keep talking and talking and talking and you never once touch me!

Thor steps forward and Loki steps backward. Thor's eyes are pleading, "You have been avoiding my touch Loki, how can I touch you, make you believe, when you do not really wish to be touched, do not really wish to believe."

Loki growls under his breath, takes a step forward, and puts his hands on Thor's chest. He gasps as his palms meet with cold stiff armor. He reaches a hand towards Thor's face and Thor grasps his hand with a warm one and brings Loki's fingers to his face. Loki carresses a cheek and the warm breath of Thor wisps over his wrist.

"But-" Loki whispered,

"Would a hallucination feel this real?" Thor asks earnestly, and before Loki can reply, "Would a clone be able to do this?" And Thor leans down, just a little, and presses his lips against Loki's. His lips are warm and chapped, where Loki's are cold and wind-bitten. Loki sighs and settles his arms around Thor's torso, and believes.


[That might be where this story ends, but just to put a tragic twist to the story let's do THIS:]

Loki opens his eyes a moment later, and sees a bright light coming right towards him, it's night, how did it become night? He sees the stars, and the bright light, and too late, he realizes that the light is a truck coming towards him, blasting on its horn, it's too late to do anything besides wait for the pain. Loki jumps, so that his legs will not be amputated, and he is sent flying by the truck.

He lands at the side of the road, and screams wordlessly and breathlessly, his chest is caved in, all of his ribs broken. He feels his heart trying to beat around the cage that has become all too constricting. His lungs are punctured by his ribs, and he can feel blood beginning to pool around him. The back of his head is caved in, and Loki wonders why it is he's not dead yet. Even for asgardians, to destroy the brain, is to destroy the God.

Getting hit always hurts, but he's only been hit by cars so far, just a few broken legs here and there, they always healed within the hour, and even now, Loki can feel his ribs start to snap back into place, his lungs filling with air, but the blood continues to pool around him, he knows he's loosing too much. Thinking is becoming too hard, everything's fading into a blurr of black and the white of the moon and stars.

"Thor," he whispers, "Thor, if you can hear me, come to me now. Thor!" He sobs, quietly, and the wind blows in the trees that sit beside the road. He looses track of his thoughts as his skull snaps back into place. Apparently Odin has blessed Loki with invincibility. Loki wonders disjointedly if Odin had thought about brain injuries and how to fix them. The blood keeps coming.

Loki feels the tears slide down his face -or is it blood? It's too hard to tell- and he drags in a harsh breath, and conjures up his magic, tries to remember how to use it to heal, remembers and forgets again in the space of a breath and falls into sleep, deep and dreamless, and one he's not sure he'll wake up from.

________________


He wakes up at the side of the road, with no idea how he got there, and he's lying in a pool of something that he rapidly determines to be his own blood... Something is wrong, Loki turns his head slightly to the side, and there's Thor, looking down at him, concern all over his face. Loki feels a scream start to build in his throat, why is this so familiar? And unconsciousness takes him once again.