catharsis_logs | Just another day in the life...

I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. I purposefully didn't take my sleeping pills so that I would wake up earlier than I'm used to. (earlier than I'm used to is 10:30AM) I went to sleep at around five or six so it wasn't all that hard to fall asleep. The staying asleep is the hard part and I managed to do that until around 11:00AM. So, around five or six hours of sleep. Yay. It's less than I'm used to, which I'm aware is pathetic, but still. I've got a counselors appointment tomorrow, which is why I didn't take my sleeping pill and why I'm awake at about the right time for me to be awake. The reason I can't just not take my sleeping pill, is because if I went to bed at a normal time (like ten) instead of five AM and I didn't take my sleeping pill, I'd wake up at the same time I went to bed last night. Which might not seem so bad to some early birds but to a night owl like me it's like being in a different world. I have some fond memories of the early morning world, but not enough for me to feel more dead tired than I already feel when I wake up in the afternoon. Sometimes it's fun to be tired in the morning, just to feel the misery with everyone else around you (I'm a sadist, both for my own pain and the pain (or at least the exhaustion) of others) but for the most part, I don't like to be that tired. lol.

So, after a brief chat with my dad, we may be going to the big electronics store in our area today. He offered to drive, and while I may want to drive there myself, I have a lot of driving to do tomorrow when I go to my counselor's office. And yes, I am nineteen years old going on twenty this year and I still don't have my driver's license. It's because I'm terrified of public performance tests and this one is a doozy. At least I have my own car now, and at least it's a bit smaller than the other car I'd been driving around until we turned it in for the new car. So it shouldn't be as hard to do as if I'd still had the buick.