Post-dramatic stress disorder
Mar. 30th, 2012 10:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
catharsis_logs I wish to be like Sherlock Holmes, either that or as innocent/scarred as John Watson. I want to be arrogant, to deserve to be arrogant. To be smarter than I am, I feel I was smart, and then I just lost it all. I feel very unintelligent, and that scares me.
I wish I could be like Sherlock, and jump off a building for non-selfish reasons. Even if it means that I have to die. To die for someone that I love, but I don't think I'd be able to do that, I think I'd be too selfish, if I came down to saving (and leaving) them, and going together, I think I'd rather we go together and never be separated. I'd love to be the murder or the suicide in a murder-suicide, just to go with someone else, hopefully someone that I loved, so that I would never be alone again.
I want to read a fanfic about how John commits suicide, and then how Sherlock lives without John. Knowing, that this time, there would be no coming back, not for John. Knowing that he would have to live with boredom and the occasional murder to keep his life as any semblance of how it was before John came, before John died.
I wish I could be like Sherlock, and jump off a building for non-selfish reasons. Even if it means that I have to die. To die for someone that I love, but I don't think I'd be able to do that, I think I'd be too selfish, if I came down to saving (and leaving) them, and going together, I think I'd rather we go together and never be separated. I'd love to be the murder or the suicide in a murder-suicide, just to go with someone else, hopefully someone that I loved, so that I would never be alone again.
I want to read a fanfic about how John commits suicide, and then how Sherlock lives without John. Knowing, that this time, there would be no coming back, not for John. Knowing that he would have to live with boredom and the occasional murder to keep his life as any semblance of how it was before John came, before John died.
